I like to think that there isn't a person on the planet who doesn't have anxieties, we are all different after all, with different backgrounds, different struggles, different pressures. One person's plans on their worst day may be the same plans as someone on their best, it's all about perspective. Some people are scared of spiders, some love and adore their fuzzy little pet tarantula called Fred, same trigger, different reactions.
I remember when I first moved out to go to university, and I was terrified of making new friends and living in an all new space. I would sit in my tiny student accommodation bedroom and stress myself out for hours before I had to leave for my lectures. I'd have a shower, do my makeup, wipe it off, do my makeup again, take another shower, constantly battling myself to act normal. Wanting to start fresh so that I could get every tiny aspect right about how I looked, and if it didn't go right, if the flick on my eyeliner smudged, I'd just start again.
Anxiety can show itself in lots of ways, sometimes it can be hoovering the same spot of floor 20 times before you leave for work, sometimes it can be stuttering, it's different for different people.
I find it best to deal with my anxieties by trying to prepare myself as much as possible.
I get to know what makes me anxious. If I know that I'm going out today to do a presentation in front of a class of people, I feel anxious as f*ck. But I also know that when I'm anxious I get stomach pains, I feel a bit sick, I get sweaty. It's not pretty but it's true. So I make sure I've got some ibuprofen in my bag if I need to take some, make sure I've eaten some breakfast and drank something before I leave, wear something loose fitting..
Spending a few minutes in the morning to prepare myself that little bit extra actually helps my anxiety loads, I just feel calmer knowing that I'm prepared for it.
Anxiety isn't pretty, everyone says confidence makes you beautiful, and honestly confidence doesn't feel like it's the problem. It's not that I'm afraid to go outside, or afraid to meet people, I'm not afraid. It's just like my body has a reaction that I'm not telling it to have. I can be perfectly fine but get sweaty palms, or just wake up in the morning with my stomach churning and a weird feeling that I don't know why I have. It's just something that I've learn't to live with and accepted as part of me. I'm not any lesser for getting anxious, it's just me.
So why is she talking about her sweaty armpits you may ask?
Well today is
Mental Health Awareness Day and it felt like the perfect day to start talking about mental health. When I started this blog I really wanted to talk a lot on the topic of mental health, it's something that's important to me and that I'm interested in, and if I can help anyone then great, if I can't then I suppose I feel better anyway in myself just being able to talk about things. It's quite therapeutic blogging about your thoughts and feelings, like keeping a diary, it makes your feelings feel valid, you understand why you do things if you take the time to write them out and really unpack it all.
To end this blog post, and keeping on the theme of mental health, I wanted to share a couple of designs I made recently for a competition at my uni. So Sheffield Hallam are having a couple of evenings of speakers talking about their experiences and giving advice to students regarding mental health in the arts, so how the pressures of being a designer, artist, illustrator, etc, can affect your mental health, and how to deal with that.
If you're interested, of course the details are on the posters, and tickets are available via
Eventbrite
However- I actually ended up winning this competition (yippee!) so if you're from Sheffield you may even see my posters around the uni campuses! Let me know if you see any, it would be amazing to see them all out and about!
So above, at the beginning of this post, is my A3/A2 poster design, and below you can see my design to go on screens around the uni.
Have an amazing mental health day my lovelies, and if anyone wants any advice, or just a chat, feel free to get in touch with me I'd be happy to talk with you! I'm always here.
Becky
